STOP Chasing the Dream that's not Yours

C.S Lewis "You are NEVER too old to set another goal, or to dream a new dream."

There is a part of my counselor brain that lights up when I read this quote. In therapy we have our clients set goals as a part of their treatment plan. The therapist and client work together on developing the goals. The therapist then walks along side the client as they make strides to get from point A to point B. While many of us would love for it to be a straight line and easy to obtain, that's not reality. 

The second part that lights up my brain as I read this quote is the word dream. For this blog we are going to use this definition of dream - cherished aspiration, ambition, ideal. We all have an idea of how we would like life to go. I believe we all have aspirations and ambitions as well. Now some might lack motivation or struggle to visualize these aspirations or ambitions as possibilities but we can't argue that we all have an "ideal". So it's fair to say that we all have or have had a dream. 

So what is your dream? We are told from a young age "dream big" or "chase your dreams". But what does that even mean? What does this quote mean? Why Evonna are you even writing about this?

Here's why:

Society tells us we have to achieve XYZ by the time we are ___ age. So we set out for those things and when those goals do not become our reality in the time frame we think it should we start to lose hope. 

When I turned the magical number 30 several months ago, it was like reality hit me. Not the reality I thought would hit me. Here I was 30 years old asking mtself what have I done thus far with my life? What will the next 30 years hold? And all those questions we often ask adolescents, I began asking myself. What problem do you want to solve because we no longer ask "what do you want to be when you grow up?" The word "legacy" became more frequent. Fear, frustration, doubt, uncertainty, inadequate are just a few of the emotions I felt that began to set in but so did hope, courage, peace, relief and joy. 

I am a planner and I had a plan and here I am 30 years old and it looks nothing like I thought it would! I mean NOTHING like I thought it would or should! So that must equate to me missing the mark or not measuring up or a failed dream...right?! 

NO! What if it had nothing to do with my circumstances and nothing to do with my abilities? I have realized that the "dream" I was chasing, this idea of where and who and what I wanted to be wasn't really what God had set out for me or called me too. (insert very wide eyes shocked face here) 

Over the last couple of months I've looked at life through a different lens. I've looked at life through healing and not complete brokeness. I've looked at where God has brought me and where He's taking me and its so incredibly exciting. But I kept striving for this BIG DREAM! And I've been praying about this and seeking God and asking Him what's keeping me from reaching that big dream. He gently shared with me that this dream I've been chasing, isn't my dream. It's the dream of others, it's what others have said I needed to do or become. It's what society has labeled as "my dream". Can you say OUCH! Today, I'm choosing to yield to the Holy Spirit and allow faith to rise up in me. I've put aside my will and I'm chasing God's will! So I'm taking the hand of my Father, fully trusting Him and taking a leap.

So friends I ask you, are you chasing a dream that's not yours? Are you trying to find your identity in something or someone? What lens do you have on? Why are you running the opposite direction so hard? I challenge you to stop! Seek God and ask Him to direct you.